Perseverance

Persist and persevere, and you will find most things that are attainable, possible. ~Lord Chesterfield

One week from today marks the last day of the new material that I am presenting in my classes for the year. The rest of the week is devoted to preparation for final exams which begin next Friday. We have thirteen more days of school. I'm sure many people don't realize how significant all of that is to me. For the past three quarters of the school year, I have taught four math classes.

Math was never my subject o' choice. Growing up, I always did well in my math classes. I graduated high school with five math credits (algebra I all the way through calculus); managed to NOT have to take remedial math in college and passed my college math classes with relatively good grades. I was always decently good in math, but I never wanted to teach it!

When the situation presented itself back in October of last year, I was at my wit's end as to what to do. I'd returned from camp to some great job prospects, but all was not as it seemed and those fantastic opportunities quickly dissolved. I was again working on short-term assignment with the MDA and they really wanted me for a full-time position, but I just did not see myself staying with non-profit long-term. (Nothing against MDA; I loved working there and have no problems with the organization itself. I just knew it was not what I wanted long-term.) When Highland's principal called with an emergency situation of sorts, my prayers went into overdrive. I stepped out, not knowing the whole situation, but trusting that God's hand was there in the midst of it all.

Looking back now, I can only say that it was only by the grace of God that I survived those early weeks. I'd not looked at an algebra problem in years, and Geometry scared me half to death! I had a whole new language to learn and I had an extremely short time in which to do so! Words like supplementary, and hypotenuse--ha, I knew that one! one down, fifty million to go!--proving congruence, transversals, theorems, and postulates.... I'd flip ahead in the book and have a panic attack! And I was supposed to be the one who knew what was going on--I was the teacher! YIKES!! Me, God? Are you SURE about this? Can't I just sub for two weeks while you set my dream job up?

The other issue was that I didn't really want to return to the classroom. I'd just spent three years in Seminary getting a master's degree--why would I want to go back to the classroom? Well, I didn't want to...but I was tired of simply existing. And it was in some sense a return to the familiar. As much as I complain about teaching, there are the things I enjoy: holidays, summer vacation, spring break...etc. ok, that's not the ONLY thing I enjoy--but it's a major perk! But there was (and still is) a little pride that sneaks into the works every now and then. I know people--the same people that I was in school with just a few years ago--that have such cool jobs. Jobs of position and prestige--careers. I am a teacher at a very small Christian school in New Iberia, Louisiana...where?...exactly!

But ya know, God's been working with me on that too. I begin to envy those 'cool' jobs and I'm reminded that God has plans for me that are beyond anything I can dream for myself (Jeremiah 29:11-13). I start to complain and then I see those who are in much more precarious positions than me, and I have to thank God for His provision in my life. I start to get bored with my life and I realize that my boredom is a case of me focusing too much on me. I have very recently come to the conclusion that I am extremely blessed. I can go to bed every night knowing that I have a job to go to in the morning. I can go home every night knowing that I have a place to lay my head. My family, both far and near, are just a phone call away, and my friends stretch the globe. I am blessed, indeed.

I don't know what the future holds. I still feel that this is all just temporary (and who knows what THAT means on God's timeline), but I feel that it's important that I take the time to appreciate what I have and where I am at this moment. For all practical purposes, my classes are finished in a week. God has lead me through one of the most challenging periods of my life. There were so many times that I have longed for the end of school--and I'm so glad that it's here--but I will miss the particular challenge that teaching outside of my field has presented.

I will soon be facing a new challenge, that of directing camp! I am nervous and excited in all different sorts of ways. I love camp. This will be my fifth year working camp and I don't know where that road will take me, but I am excited to have this opportunity. It's scary in an adrenaline-drenched sort of way! I leave in less than a month and I have about a million things to do before I go, but I can't wait!

And when I return in August, I will be returning to Highland, this time to teach English and Bible which are MUCH more my style! A new challenge of sorts...and so it goes. I've never read the book, A Long Obedience in the Same Direction, by Eugene Peterson, but I've always loved the title. In today's society, it's so easy to quit when the going gets rough. To decide, "hmmm, I think I'm ready for something new," and jump ship. But the call of the believer is to follow Christ daily, moment by moment, in every decision and with every act. It's truly the most challenging calling I can think of and it's no wonder that we all fail! But the beauty of our relationship with God is that He knows we will fail, but he calls us to follow anyway. He chooses to use us...and if he chooses to use me, how could I think to deny him.

This became much longer and more introspective than I'd intended. It's simply a simple version of some of the stuff that's been rolling around in my head recently. Thanks for letting me share!